BREAKING NEWS: Cards make Brendan Ryan available

Big news on the Hot Stove this afternoon. The Cardinals have declared a fucking shitty, mustached-wearing below average shortstop available. Until now, he’s more well known for being one of the stoned looking guys in this infamous Colby Rasmus pic than his baseball career.

The Cardinals feel that Ryan Theriot is an upgrade at shortstop over incumbent Brendan Ryan. Ryan is now expendable, according to Derrick Goold of the St. Louis Post-Dispatch: “The Cardinals have let other teams know Ryan is available, and they’ll look to trade him during next week’s winter meetings in Florida, if not sooner.”

BWaaaaaaaaahahahahhahahaha! Thanks for letting everyone know Cards! Everybody get in line Bendan Ryan is available in a few days, if not sooner! MLB teams, please take a number and don’t be hoggish over this .223 hitting ballplayer who looks like shit.

  • Ryan was terrible this year from the 150+ games i watched. His average dropped like 50+ points and his throwing accuracy to first was even worse. Theriot is a good addition and i expect more in the upcoming weeks. Cardinals need base running worse than anything else.