We’ve spoken before about fantasy league whores. The term actually came about in high school when we started a fantasy league of the guys we played ball with. There’s different candidates, but by the end of the year there’s always just one glaring whore that everyone takes a swipe at to use and get what they need only to dump them in the alley way after a few unfulfilled starts. And if they’re a really good whore; some guys will take multiple turns on.
As I write this post I think back to Fantasy Baseball League Whores of yesteryear. Frank Thomas, Jose Lima, Jim Thome, Adrian Beltre, and the biggest whore of them all Greg Maddux. This special and dubious award wouldn’t be what it is today without those men and their brave efforts.
Ladies and Gentleman, I’m proud to announce the Fantasy League Whore for the year 2010 in the Die Hard Bleacher Bums league is none other then Nick ‘the dick’ Swisher.
Nick has been passed around like a mushy cookie at a fraternity house. I’ve personally added/dropped him now 5 times. He just keeps coming back for more and every time is a little better then the time before. That’s a good whore for you. Know what else makes him a whore? He’s somehow logged 63 games in my lineup, hit 10 home runs and driven in only 27 RBI. He’s scored 29 runs and hasn’t stolen a single base. Like any true whore, he’s saved his very worst behavior for when I decide to pick him up.
As we’ve talked about before, Swisher is a down and dirty kind of player and we’re sure he’d be happy to win this award. Finish strong Nick, you slut. We need your torn up ass to win a title.