Category Archives: Fantasy Baseball

The Gentleman’s Cup DFS Game: Swindaman3 begins his takeover

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Friday night was a little bit of an intimidating slate, so if you jumped into the action on Draftkings or another Daily Fantasy Baseball site, you definitely deserve some props for your courage. The nightly slate featured a Coors Field game that got wild, aces all over the board, and of course the unpredictability that a full slate brings.

One man who was not scared was Swindaman3. He took the Gentleman’s Game by storm for the second week in a row, this time scoring an impressive 168.05 points. He had three hitters cross the 20-point mark (Longoria, Belt, LeMahieu) and his pitching from Archer and Greinke was good enough to make this a drama-free gentleman’s game; though there were some reports of JSquad34 throwing some furniture around in the cocktail room when Andrelton Simmons posted a zero.

Yearly Standings:
Diamondhoggers – 25 points
Swindaman3 – 22 Points
t3bird04 – 21 Points
DStars45 – 20 points
Jsquad34 – 16 Points

And congratulations to our very own t3bird04. In a contest not as heralded as The Gentleman’s Game earlier in the week; with some 110,000 contestants, he came in an astonishing 17th. He also won the $6K Flare that night! Using a Cardinals stack and some of the very tricks that have shown him success in this tournament of champions, other players with their 30 entries need be wary of t3Bird04. He is a dangerous man.

Here’s a copy of Swindaman3’s lineup from Friday night – a lineup that allowed him to move into sole possession of second place in the Gentleman’s Cup Standings:

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So what will happen next week? Will Swindaman3 continue to shoot up the standings and grab the lead over Diamondhoggers? Will DStars45 come back with a vengeance to reclaim a top spot? Will JSquad34 be satisfied with his lineup? Will the t3bird04 go out on a limb and stack Marlins? You must stay tuned for the answer.

A Country Breakfast Past Midnight Decides the Gentleman’s Cup Game

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This week five Gentleman’s Game Cup series was decided by two ‘great’ calls by Swindaman3: the stones to use Clay Buchholz, who delivered 36.2 points with 11 strikeouts in Seattle; and a contrarian play of Billy Butler in a game that got wild late out in Oakland.

Diamondhoggers led the contest almost the entire way until when it mattered, aided by 26 points from Gerardo Parra and 30 points from two-homer Ryan Braun.

Who would know that a late-night base hit by Country Breakfast that didn’t even make Sportcenter could decide such high drama.

Four of the five contestants used Clayton Kershaw who scored 28.8 points.


Yearly Standings:
Diamondhoggers – 23 points
DStars45 – 19 points
t3bird04 – 17 Points
Swindaman3 – 17 Points
Jsquad34 – 13 Points

Here’s a copy of the winning lineup that got the job done for Swindaman3:

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The Gentleman’s Cup Series is heating up with the weather. Things are getting tight in the middle and Diamondhoggers is beginning to distance themselves from the likes of JSquad34. But we have an entire summer of Gentleman Fun to decide the victor.

Will a late-night Country Breakfast give someone a gallstone attack next weekend? Will anyone have the audacity to use Clay Buchholz once again? Will Pete Kozma ever make an appearance in the Gents cocktail party?

You must all stay tuned to find out.

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Diamond Hoggers takes a low scoring Gentleman’s Game Home

Have you been following The Gentleman’s Game? If you haven’t, you need to start. It is the Pantheon of Daily Fantasy Baseball. At season’s end, a winner will be crowned. That man will retain bragging rights for life of winning the inaugural Gentleman’s Cup which is worth more than a sack of nickels. His family will adore him just a bit more. He will have just a bit more pep in his step. Autograph requests will arrive via mail courier. He will need a bodyguard. Screw the Playboy Mansion, this is bigger than that.

Diamond Hoggers wins this weeks gentleman’s game with a subpar effort of 125+. This would be good for your double up on Draftkings but probably have you on the outside looking in on most tournaments. Or you’ll win that frustrating $6 for coming in like 600th of 8300. So nice of Draftkings to pay that $6 back to those who beat out those some 7600 others. Daily Fantasy Sports can be a racket. And I can’t get enough of it for some reason.

Yearly Standings:
Diamondhoggers – 19 points
DStars45 – 18 points
t3bird04 – 16 Points
Swindaman3 – 12 Points
Jsquad34 – 10 Points

Winning lineup: A late two-hit, three-walk night from Buster Posey pulled Diamondhoggers ahead for good late on Friday night. Trevor Bauer has found his suck again – felt that one coming but went with him anyways. And it is possible that the Gentleman’s Game MVP for this week was little Dexter Fowler and his 28 mighty points for less than 4000.

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The Gentleman’s Game Cup Series – Swindaman3 wins the week

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With a big home run from Evan Gattis, and a 30+ point performance from Lance Lynn on the mound, Swindaman3 posted a hearty effort that had him celebrating his first Gentleman’s Game Cup Series Victory.

Last night was a strange night on DraftKings and in Daily Fantasy Baseball if you decided to venture into the murky waters. In contrast to last week’s high-scoring affair, it seemed like a good lineup last night was simply breaking 100; as evidenced by the contestants in this great pantheon.

“I would rather win a Gentleman’s cup than climb Mt. Everest or finish a marathon,” Swindaman3 said after the hard-fought victory, which saw him edge out t3Bird04 by just over seven points.

The yearly standings see the top three players gridlocked in a tie for first place, while the group still waits for Jsquad34 to join the party.

Yearly Standings:
DStars45 – 14 points
Diamondhoggers – 14 points
t3bird04 – 14 Points
Swindaman3 – 11 Points
Jsquad34 – 7 Points

Here is a copy of the winning lineup:
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As for us, we went with highly-rated plays like Jose Abreu (he loves Friday evenings), Mookie Betts, and Kyle Seager. Plays that were regarded by wOBA metrics and Derek Carty and experts alike. This trio yielded two points.

Gentleman’s Game Cup Series, Week Three: DStars45 Sets a New Gentleman’s Game Record

On Friday evening, our panel of professionals took their usual stab at grabbing points in the Gentleman’s Cup Series.

Despite a rousting effort by t3bird04, DStars45 was the whole show. Helped along by monstrous efforts from the likes of Felix Hernandez, Carlos Martinez, and Anthony Rizzo; DStars45 sets a new Gents Game high score of 176.4 and takes home the five point first-place finish for the third week, pulling him ever so slightly ahead of us.
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Most interesting of DStars45’s lineup was that his highest-priced hitter; Buster Posey, tallied the only zero out in the rarified air of Coors Field. DStars45 was also helped by $2000 Jimmy Paredes who hit three hole in Baltimore and represented well by going yard.

Yearly Standings:
DStars45 – 12 points
Diamondhoggers – 11 points
t3bird04 – 10 Points
Swindaman3 – 6 Points
Jsquad34 – 6 Points

Here’s a look at the winning lineup:

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If you were one of the unfortunate ones who decided to pump in a few nickels to the DFS world for the first time tonight, you were welcomed with uncharacteristically high scoring. A lineup of 160 points was probably good enough to make you $10, if you placed your chips correctly.

However, in this game of champions, this series of greatness; only one man can take-all. Forget the millions, the trips to Vegas or the Playboy Mansion. The man who rises from the ashes of the gents game late in September will be known as the finest champion the Daily Fantasy Baseball world has ever known.

Next week these five men continue onward in this royal gala of DFS competition.

And you must stay tuned. Yes, you must stay tuned to find out the incredible drama. Will Swindaman3 play Xander Bogaerts once again when he is sitting? Will the silent JSquad34 rise up and yell? Will the T3bird step to the end of the limb and use Mike Pelfrey? Tune in next week to the Gentleman’s Game Cup Series to find out.

“I Brought a Whore to the Prom.” – Adventures of the Week Two Gentleman’s Game Cup


Last night over on DraftKings (the official daily fantasy sponsor of Major League Baseball, for whatever that is worth), the Gentleman’s Game Cup Circuit rolled along in week two, with Adam Warren being a big thorn in everyone’s side.

We rolled with Warren because we are subscribers to “The Bat” over at Fantasy Insiders. They had cheap little 4400 dollar or whatever Adam Warren ranked ahead of Corey Kluber, Max Scherzer, and Clayton Kershaw on this April evening. This couldn’t be possible; but off we went with Adam Warren plugged into several various lineups. We weren’t the only ones (see above image).

It turns out, the bat is burping up incorrect and glitched names in regards to whomever is facing the Rays lineup each night. This would of course have been great to know until we played about 15 games on Friday night.

But Adam Warren could not spoil the Gents Game for Diamondhoggers, Mike Trout, Josh Donaldson, and Russell Martin would not allow that to happen.

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Yearly Standings:
Diamond Hoggers – 8 Points
DStars45 – 7 points
t3bird04 – 6 Points
Swindaman3 – 5 Points
Jsquad34 – 4 Points

Things are heating and scrambling up in the Gents Game standings, and we’re only just getting started in our adventure. So stay tuned to the saga for next Friday on who can begin to separate themselves in this Daily Fantasy Baseball Pantheon. This game of honor, and class. Will the Bat cause us to use Ubaldo Jimenez over Chris Sale? Will someone stack the light hitting Oakland A’s against King Felix? Will Jason Marquis become someone’s Gentleman’s Game MVP? What names will the bat of Fantasy Insiders burp up next Friday? You must stay tuned until next week in the Gentleman’s Cup Circuit to find out.

The Draftkings Gentleman’s Game Cup: Week 1


Over on Draftkings, we run a weekly game on Fridays called the ‘Gentleman’s Game’. All year we’ll keep track of the standings here and see how each of us fare.

The leading point getter at years end in the standings shall be declared winner of the inaugural Gentleman’s Cup on Draftkings, a merit of the highest honor.

Yearly Standings:
DStars45 – 5 points
Swindaman3 – 4 Points
Diamond Hoggers – 3 Points
t3bird04 – 2 Points
Jsquad34 – 1 Point

Here’s a copy of the winning lineup:

Building a case AGAINST Jose Abreu

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It’s been a long time since I’ve been as impressed with a rookie power bat like I was Jose Abreu in 2014. I admit that moments like this one could lead to a little man-crush blindness on my part on a guy. I will not usually do my due diligence on Abreu; entering his age 28 season, rolling up to my fantasy drafts ready to add him to a roster at all costs without any reservations.

Recently, Ray Flowers who is considered by some to be a Fantasy Baseball Expert has taken Abreu’s hype to task by saying things like he’s not a top five fantasy first basemen in 2015, and then tonight this:

What I’m here to do is build a case against Abreu and dig a little deeper before I’m in too deep and have him on four or five rosters just in time for his collapse. It seems Flowers has done a bit more work than I have on the subject, so I’ll begin with reasons why you might want to look away from Abreu on draft day or proceed with caution.

  • Abreu had a .356 BABIP in 2014. Alright, this is going to go down. You can theorize a couple things here when a guy has a high BABIP: 1) the guy is so lucky he shits golden eggs; or 2) he hits the ball real hard when it’s in play and it’s past people. I think it was more a combination of the two then simple luck. Fangraphs had this man at 100 line drives even last year. That’s exceptional (23.3%, almost a fourth of the time he hit a line drive).
  • Alright, so he’s not going to sustain a .356 average on balls hit in play, what if that number goes to just .300 which is assumed as league average. You’ve still got a monster on your hands who hits .275 or .270 instead of .319, and there’s no reason to think the power numbers decrease based on his fb% and gb/fb ratio. But I’m not building the case against Abreu here, am I?
  • Abreu was afflicted with ankle tendinitis in May of last season, landing him on the disabled list and being the sole reason he didn’t hit 40 home runs. In my opinion, this is an injury that has a fair chance of returning at some point. It’s not to say that it’s a chronic problem, but it’s not exactly like a viral infection that needed a few weeks to clear up. For those that have had tendinitis in a joint, these things have a way of flaring up again.
  • Abreu’s O-Swing % last season was 41.7%, a full point higher then Josh Hamilton who got himself into a mess of a season by notoriously swinging at too many pitches and namely; too many bad pitches.
  • Abreu entered last season with no book on him – seeing a fastball come his way from the opposing pitcher 52.7% of the time. Check this off for reason to be concerned; while this number could see itself decrease, this is well below the 60% that a prime-aged Albert Pujols saw or the 64.2% that Mike Trout saw in 2014. He’s more likely than anything to see more fastballs and unless bat speed decreases, he’ll handle them. But we’re working to build a case against Abreu here.
  • Abreu might see some time at designated hitter with Adam LaRoche being added to the White Sox roster in the offseason. Abreu’s zone-rating was -2.4 last season while LaRoche has a career -1.9; including a -5.2% last season. Best guess is two-thirds of the time Abreu will be the positional first basemen while LaRoche DH’s. This would allow for more chance for injury and increase some fatigue but some players admittedly hit better when they’ve brought their glove to the park. At best, this theory is a push.

More or less, I’ve thought of all the angles here. It all adds up to a very low chance of Abreu regressing much – and if he does you have a .270 hitter with 30 home runs and around 100 RBI. That’s close to first round value in today’s MLB and it’s certainly in the top 25 overall players in most fantasy formats.

We will dig this post up after next season and review what went right and what went wrong for Abreu. We’ll go with a bullish projection on him: .285/40 HR/110 RBI and cite increased talent in the lineup and of course the launching pad he plays his home games in while being a year wiser. Now don’t make us look foolish Big Cuban Stud.

Baseball Whiz – Another Great Fantasy Baseball Resource


I’ve played in a highly-competitive rotisserie keeper league since 2010 with my friend Zac, where I saw first-hand his fantasy baseball savvy tactics.

Zac has started his site – The Baseball Whiz – and it’s a site I think everyone should keep an eye on this year with a lot of rankings and resources. He’s also rolling out a draft guide for 2015 in the next day or two. We provided our top 20 positional rankings along with some fun preseason predictions, so keep an eye out for that.

Zac is a former player and very knowledgeable fantasy owner whom I respect a lot. I look for him to do big things in this realm. You can follow him on Twitter @FantasyWhizMLB .

Gathering a number of different perspectives this time of year undoubtedly gives you a leg up over the guys in your respective leagues who aren’t doing it. We give Baseball Whiz the seal of approval to be one of those sites you can add to your fantasy blogroll with confidence.

Farewell, Sweet ‘Street

I’ve been in a cranky and somber mood since I heard the news: DraftStreet has been sold to DraftKings. At the beginning of this season I learned of the world that is Daily Fantasy Baseball. I’ve played on average about five games per night since. It’s the greatest world I’ve ever known.

When I look back on my life – my life in baseball – I will have a VERY special place in my heart of this half season I got to enjoy on DraftStreet and the excitement it brought to common weeknights with a short slate of games or the huge weekend tournaments.

Daily Fantasy will not be the same, no site out there pulls every little intricacy together as well as the site I fell in love with in April. The greatest things in life certainly don’t last.

All that remains are the memories, the sweet memories. I still remember the night I took down one of the greats, a guy I admire a lot in the Daily Fantasy realm:


As for DraftKings, this isn’t going to work, probably for the reason I am not fully comfortable playing there. I’m a daily fantasy turtle without a shell right now. This is out of the Forbes article I linked, and I think it simply holds a lot of truth:

“We spent a long time with IAC evaluating DraftStreet and whether to make a bid,” added Eccles of FanDuel. IAC committed to investing in DraftStreet in 2013. ”Ultimately we declined to bid for them. Around 70% of the revenues on both DraftStreet and DraftKings comes from players who already have FanDuel accounts. So we would be spending money for players we already had. Additionally, the top reasons for people to play on DraftStreet included their unique pricing and roster configurations, snake drafts and pickems. So trying to bring over the players when you don’t have those games is a mistake.”

There are no shortcuts in life. You can buy a client base of a site but without giving us the things that made us love – and made us so loyal in playing on that site – you simply won’t sustain any amount of consistent success.

Daily fantasy will never be the same. I’m just so happy to have known my times on the ‘Street. Now I must think of all the foes I’ll never conquer and the scores I’ll never be able to settle.

DraftStreet Picks for June 26th

Short and compact tonight, just like a Chase Utley cut! No, he’s not part of the Daily Wolf Pack.

Mike Leake ($12,349) – Would you believe Leake’s fly-ball % is down almost a full ten percent since he debuted as a rookie? It’s 24.8% this season. The Giants are full of pesky veteran hitters, but it’s a big park they’re playing in tomorrow night and I would take the under total bet even with Ryan Vogelsong starting on the other side. It’s going to be that kind of game. Leake eats innings and should keep the ball in the yard. I tell you what I wouldn’t do – I sure the Hell wouldn’t run Vogelsong out there for $2,000+ more. I like Leake a lot better tomorrow, for once.

Melky Cabrera ($7,555) – Scott Carroll, poor Scotty Carroll has got like; no chance tomorrow. The Blue Jays are going to score a pile of runs and the Melk-man is going to be in the middle of all of it. He’s sitting on 98 hits for the season, he’ll be at or over 100 by night’s end tomorrow. He sports a .311 average against righties. Pay the premium and let the man fill your stat sheet.

Ike Davis ($5,025) – Man, it feels like shit to endorse Ike Davis in any manner. The guy is hitting .050 against lefties which would matter if he was facing a lefty tomorrow, but he’s got Dice-K in his sights. Righties support his entire stat-line, they are his lifeline in this world. He only exists to hit them. For most first base options with home run potential you’ll pay a premium, but not for stinky Ike. We won’t go as far as saying he will homer, but we have a feeling. Now we’re gonna go take a shower.

How about a couple Milwaukee mini-stack options to get to Christian Friedrich in Coors Field-lite:

Mark Reynolds ($6,129)
Khris Davis ($6,486)
Rickie Weeks ($4,968)

Draftstreet Picks for June 25th

We’re rolling out a new column here that should be a semi-regular feature at Diamond Hoggers. We’ll talk through some of the players involved in the following day’s Draftstreet Daily Fantasy Baseball slate, we’ll roll out a few winning plays, and send you folks home happy.

If you like fantasy baseball, and you’re not familiar with Draftstreet you pretty much have two solid pieces of advice you should take from us: 1) stay away from it, because it’s more addicting than crack; or 2) head over to Draftstreet and tell them Diamond Hoggers sent you, if you do they’ll give you a deposit bonus that will give you some free play for when you fail. It’s like golf, and real baseball. Failure is part of the damn game. Now be a good recruit and play hundreds of games a month, okay?

We’re rolling out our model today that we like to call the “WOLF” model. The WOLF model was inspired by our good friend Corey, who has written for this site and also introduced us to Daily Fantasy Baseball. He’s also known by those who know him as ‘The Wolf of Draftstreet’. Without getting to far off track, please pay attention to the acronym, for this model will help you identify key plays each day in daily fantasy:

W – wOBA. Weighted on-base average. If you can figure out the guys who project well for the following day’s wOBA, you have a great baseline for who is going to be a big hit on the street. Basically, these are the guys who aren’t going to make outs; and it gives weight to them if they do big shit like extra base hits. Don’t know about wOBA? Daddy’s got your wOBA right here. Learn it, love it.

O – Opposing Pitcher. Fairly self explanatory. You’ll want to target 4th or 5th starters that have garden-variety stuff. When you’re choosing your hitters for the next day, build a lineup with cheaper hitters that can get rich off an off-brand like Colby Lewis or Fausto Carmona. No one wants to go into the Lions Den that is a lineup facing Clayton Kershaw or Adam Wainwright. The biggest heroes ever written about always died in the end. Don’t do it.

L – Lineup. You need to invest the time each night to take a look and see if there are cheap players at a money spot in the lineup. Let me toot my own horn here, as last night I spotted Logan Morrison in the fifth spot in the Mariner lineup just before lineups were due. Morrison in the seven hole is worthless to me. Now Morrison in the middle of the order like that against a righty; for $3,098 I think it was, sign me up. Look for pesky lead-off men who might sneak in an extra plate appearance. There’s value there. If someone is outside that top five spots in the order, they should take a hit in value in your model. Excuse me, OUR model.

F – Field. Where are they playing? Is it in a run-scoring environment? Is this a hitter’s heaven like Coors or Great American for run totals or is it a boring morgue like Oakland or Petco? Anyone who has played on the ‘Street regularly knows a classic Coors Field Game can change your fortunes if you’re part of it or fuck things up royally if you don’t get a piece of the action.

Now for the daily set of picks, we’ll call it the Daily Wolf Pack:

Anibal Sanchez ($17,097) – 2.33 ERA, 59 strikeouts in 69 innings and he’s got the chance to get you over 10. The bottom line is the Rangers are heading in the wrong direction, the arrow of the Rangers is headed downward. The public perception is the Rangers are a strong offensive team; they really aren’t this year and they’re not hot. If you want to avoid ace prices and build your pitching staff around a safe option without premium pricing, this is the guy to start with.

Dexter Fowler ($5,305) – Sometimes, there are splits you just can’t ignore. Dexter is a .347 hitter against left-handed pitching, he’s got nearly a 1 to 1 BB to K ratio (12/15) against southpaws. We think highly enough of Braves starter Alex Wood, but Fowler should be in that top three of the lineup, so at that price he’s worth the play.

Kole Calhoun ($4,968) – I’ve watched this young man a lot, and he’s got some thunder in his bat. As long as he’s hitting in front of Trout, he’s going to get some fastballs he can handle. He’ll be facing a righty in his home park, and he’s a .273 hitter against them. He’s not going to blow up for 20 points, but he’s not going to log very many goose-eggs either. This is a good price for a lead-off guy.

Dan Haren ($14,294) – Look, he’s a shithead who has the tendency to give up some gopher balls, but the bottom line is the Dodgers need this game badly and they can probably count on the veteran to give them a quality start against a lineup whose top hitters are surprisingly better off lefties in a mediocre hitter’s park. Roll the dice on Haren – since you’ll need to on someone – and spend the money on building a great lineup with….

Mike Trout ($9,664) – It’s the world’s best hitter against an off-brand making his second career start. He’ll do something. Mike Trout is part of any model.

Good luck, and good luck build a winner with the WOLF model!

‘Chicken Soup’ Rosario is doing what he does best tonight; sitting on the roost

Baby Bull? More like Sitting Bull.
Baby Bull? More like Sitting Bull.

I owned Wilin Rosario last year in fantasy baseball, and I have to say it opened my eyes to one of the few things in baseball I apparently had been missing. This fuckin’ guy gets A LOT of days off where he’s not in the lineup. Seriously, he makes Bryce Harper look like an everyday player.

I meant to do this post two days ago, when Rosario got the night off after catching a whole six innings the night prior. I missed the boat, but I didn’t stress out about it; because you see I knew that Wilin Rosario would be sitting again soon. Tonight, that moment came once again.

I honestly wanted to put Walt Weiss in a very foreign choke hold of sorts last season because Rosario would be starting to get hot, and slated to face a left-handed pitcher at Coors Field. And then Walt Weiss would pull Rosario out of the lineup because he had a cold or needed his rest, etc.

It was absolutely mind-numbing. I wish I was exaggerating to tell you that Rosario seemed to play about three to four days a week on average in his good weeks. That was when he didn’t have an infected wisdom tooth, common cold, pulled hamstring, viral infection, water fungus on his fuckin’ elbow, day game after a night game, or asshole Weiss just sitting him because he played two days in a row.

I honestly got into the habit of rostering two catchers in fantasy baseball to safeguard against ‘Chicken Soup’ Rosario; and I am so thankful I did it because I was rewarded with Jonathan Lucroy this year late-round (lucked into that one) but this year with Lucroy and the Cather Du’ Jour on the roster I really don’t have a need for two catchers because Lucroy plays every night.

Look – I get that Rosario is a terrible defensive catcher – but his days off are absolutely excessive. Even though he has the immune system of a man with a T-Cell count of 12; I think it would be reasonable if he was in the lineup just a little bit more often.

Chicken Soup Rosario, sitting on his roost again. Watching over his flock of Rockies.

Fantasy Baseball Rundown

Oswaldo Arcia has been very hitterish thus far.
Oswaldo Arcia has been very hitterish thus far.

We’re starting off something new here that we expect to do once a week or maybe even twice a week if it’s good fun. We are big fantasy baseball folks here; we’re just going to do some commentary on a lot of the league and where we gauge the pulse with guys right now.

Starting us off today is the man pictured above; OSWALD!

Oswaldo Arcia – Hit a nice line drive home run into the second deck off his homer-friendly friend Vidal Nuno last night. I feel like it’s his time to do some damage. Last year he was off the grill a little early. Right now he’s just right – ripe for 15-20 HR perhaps hitting in the middle of the Minnesota order. If he’s still on your waiver wire don’t leave him there.

Xander Bogaerts – .380 OBP SS. How many of them are there in baseball? Two of them right now. He’s over .300, there aren’t a lot of those either. He’s hitting second in that order for a reason and he’s going to stay there. I am sick that I dealt him.

Mike Trout – how about that slumping Mike Trout. Boy he sure does suck! Another monster home run last night in Oakland, he’s hit in 11 straight and is over .400 during that time. Listen to the spoiled Mike Trout fantasy owners crybaby about how he’s not stealing enough. He’s like that chick that is hot in every way but you don’t like how much she calls. When Trout calls, don’t ice it. If you can even get a chick like him to call you.

Yangervis Solarte – He honestly reminds me of Robbie Cano when Cano was coming up in the world like a regular Tony Montana, trying so sell cocaine and make his way. We’re talking 2006 Cano. He is a very good offensive player right now in a perfect park for his swing, and he has Swiss-Army knife eligibility (2B/SS).

Adam Lind – When Jose Abreu went down, I needed a 1B fix. Do you see what he’s doing to right-handed pitching right now? Murdering it. He came into today hitting .384 against righties.

Francisco Liriano – Got it together a little bit last night against the Dodgers, working the change-up. I still notice he can’t get left-handed batters out with any regularity, his biggest difference from last years days of dominance. It is tempting to see what’s possible when he’s slightly on.

Oscar Taveras – Welcome to the big league fraternity, kid. Just when you thought the Cardinals weren’t that impressive of an offense they’re bailed out by two youngsters who you know will be impactful the rest of the way in Kolten Wong and Oscar the Cardinal.

Kolten Wong – Speaking of…. I have this simulator where I traded for him and he was a remarkably solid player for a solid 12 to 14 seasons offensively. I think the simulator knew something.

Dexter Fowler – He’s cooled off some, but in his last 16 games he’s walked 15 times and is hitting .291. That lineup is mostly harmless, but like the sweet peregrine falcon at the zoo, you stick your hand in that cage and one time it will tear your finger clean off. That’s Dexter Fowler.

Adam Eaton – You’re going to have to start earning your keep around here, Mighty Mouse.

Ian Kennedy – I never thought much of him in the past, and I saw him on the waiver wire and gave him a shot. All he’s done since then is strike out 44 batters in 36 and 2/3 innings, walking 11. Those are winning numbers and I don’t care where you get them from.

Erick Aybar – This Punch and Judy has 29 RBI so far. Monitor these next few weeks. If you need runs he’s a capable guy off the waiver wire.

Mike Napoli – I just plucked him off the waiver wire and stashed his ass. I’m quite excited about it. He should be back soon. He hit bombs for a few weeks without use of a pinky. It was at the expense of Juan Francisco, whom I cut. I’m still excited.

Chad Qualls – Make sure this guy isn’t plankton on the bottom of the waiver wire sea floor. He added a couple of saves this past week, including a four-out save last night. The Houston pen is usually not worth thinking about, but Qualls seems to have a lock-down on the job.

Devin Mesoraco – Grand slam last night. I can’t stay it enough; this guy is a monster and would be an All-Star without the hamstring injury earlier in the year. He’s done exactly this at every level. This isn’t going away.

Hanley Ramirez – I watch his AB’s every night and I think he’s one of the most overrated players in the game. Why do people value this guy like he’s one of the elite? He’s not. The swing is stiff and rigid. Try to sell him to someone who thinks he’s elite. Don’t be that guy.

Corey Kluber – There isn’t a pitcher in the game today who is more dominant. There is no debate right now. Right now is over in the blink of an eye but for this last six week run, he’s been unreal; making your pitching staff much better than you thought it would be.

Justin Verlander – He’s not striking people out anymore, and he’s walking people to boot. Don’t get excited yet about those seven strikeouts in 7 and 2/3 last night. We’re a long way from being back.

Yasiel Puig – I think you’re looking at the number one overall player in fantasy for 2014, is what I think when we talk about this prize-winning Puig.

That’s all for now. Do well this week!