Elijah Dukes is out of his fucking mind. We’ve said it once, and we’ll say it again. In the past few years I never remember a figure in baseball being such a thug. How did this guy have time to put down his Aut-6 long enough to learn the game as a kid?
On his estranged wife:
“I know if I stayed with her I’d physically be in prison because she provoked me by hitting me. She done hit me across the head with a picture frame and everything. I hate that because I told my kids I would never go back to jail for no domestic violence.”
On his domestic violence issues:
“When did I get in trouble for domestic violence over the last year and a half?”
On the 17-year-old he impregnated:
“We and her did something one-time … I know for a fact, I know for a fact … if that’s my child, why does it have to be broadcast?”
On needing help/guidance:
‘Elijah, do you need help?’
“No! Do I need guidance? Yeah, I need guidance … I went to jail for breaking a remote control.”
On….we don’t have a fucking clue:
“Just like the Bible says, If you know it’s not true you don’t have to say anything and I haven’t been saying anything. But I will say something about this situation with my mom out my mouth, because everyone knows I do love my mom. And I am tough on my mom but I know for fact I never told nobody my mom smoked crack because that would be a lie on my behalf. She never told me and I never caught her.”
No matter what your standing is on Elijah Dukes, and at this point you’re thinking the same thing as we are; we know it, this guy is seemingly a new sound byte each day and a ticking time bomb waiting to happen.
Look on the positive side though, it gets the Devil Rays some notoriety, albeit not positive, but it is notoriety. I have a feeling how this all ends–in bloodshed. Dukes locking himself in a room with someone held hostage and that same Aut-6 we mentioned earlier. Bulletts, and carnage. Obscenities. More ramblings about crack. I’d be willing to bet for all the talent that ESPN the Magazine ranted and raved about Dukes having, it doesn’t end with a trip to Cooperstown in 15 years. I’m just glad he’s off my fantasy team and I don’t have to root for this waste of human matter anymore.
Read More: Dukes makes Ron Artest look like a bunny (The Big Lead)
Angry Dukes sounds off (The Heater)
Elijah Dukes is on the air (Deadspin)
Podcast of Dukes going bat shit (620 WDAE)