You know what I don’t want under my tree right now? Reds tickets.
In fact, if my wife gets me anything to do with the Reds–especially something that would necessitate me driving two hours to the stadium and two hours home from said stadium–I’m going to act like the biggest disappointed spoiled brat baby there is on Christmas morning.
At the end of the day, you can dress up your plain old chicken dish with as much garnish as you would like. You can try and capitalize on my holiday cheer, like you’ve attempted to do with the above ad. But at the end of the day, if you go out and field the same team with your marquee edition being a Jamey Carroll-esque free agent or Ryan Theriot for that matter; I want nothing to do with you. Especially this time of year. It’s football season. I don’t even want to think about the Reds, and frankly they’ve given me no reason to do so.
You know when I was excited about the Reds this time of year? December of 2009. I even went to Redsfest, which I have talked myself out of following the 2008, 2010, and 2011 seasons. Times where looking up.
They had just gone out and signed Aroldis Chapman, out-bidding several other winning franchises. If you had followed baseball long enough, you just knew they were about to stumble upon something special. Jay Bruce would emerge. Joey Votto would be the MVP. That summer of 2010 would be magical. And they’ve done absolutely nothing since to promote my return business.
You want me to chase Votto bobbleheads and buy 4-packs in December? Give me a reason to do it. And until then think of a new promotion other than bobbleheads for goodness sakes.
You’re lucky I have a dog now–so I’ll see you April 24th for Bark in the Park Night. And that isn’t even for me! That’s for my kid. But hey, all you of you who scramble to get your new edition of your Votto bobblehead have fun with it when he’s playing in Toronto in 2013.