So the entire season I’m dominating my Yahoo Head-to-Head Fantasy Baseball league. I enter this end of the season horseshit tournament as the overwhelming #1 seed. All season long, my team dominated every single category except for the occasional slip up in which I’d only win 7 to 3 or 8-2 instead of 9-1 or 10-0 for the week.
I’m cruising right along and yesterday I need good starts from Adam Wainwright, Randy Wolf, and…….. Joba Chamberlain. Aparently, I should have left Joba out of things. I would have advanced to the championship round that I earned all season long. Instead, I’m left playing for 3rd place in my Yahoo Sports fantasy league.
Joba goes out yesterday and shits the futon. Wainwright and Wolf do their jobs. My team steals 2 bases on Sunday to tie that category, so all I need to do is catch my opponent in one pitching category. Due to Joba, it didn’t happen.
My team, which included Pablo Sandoval, Albert Pujols, Prince Fielder, Ryan Howard, Derek Jeter, Brandon Phillips (on the bench), Aaron Hill, Justin Upton, Hanley Ramirez, and every other fucking stud that plays the game; is now sitting at home. A great draft, great pickups, great lineup moves are all for naught because I lost 5-4 this past round. Now two boring teams are left playing for the gold.
People, listen to me. This is why you should never agree to do a Head to Head fantasy league, under any condition. You will waste your time. I’ll have you know that the true baseball knowledge shows in a rotisserie league that the categories are cumulative in all season long. That way you won’t get robbed by a fat toad like Joba Chamberlain in what was basically a tune-up start for him on the road in Seattle. I’m proud to say I’m going to win my 10-team Roto ESPN fantasy league. That will soften the blow a little bit. As for you Joba, thanks again.