Are you happy Toronto Won?

Something about this game definitely belonged on this blog a long time ago. One of the most hideous fucking baseball video games of all time, Sports Talk Baseball for the Sega Genesis. You might remember this gem of a title because of it’s more famous cousin, Joe Montana’s Sports Talk Football.

They’re equally fucking hideous, with the one consistent factor in the game being the old man who grumbles out such lovely audibles like “A BEAUTY!” after kick-offs and “he throws to first, he throws ta second, throws ta first, OFF THE WALL!”

The legendary voice that was why they coined the name of the game has been named by my friends and I, Lon Palasky. And if you want to ask why, it is because he looks like a Lon Palasky (see above).

You know, I was so excited to get this game as a kid. I remember the day I got to rent it (back then I was really upset that my parents wouldn’t just buy it for me) and I put it in the Sega Genesis. I ended up getting drilled like 14-1 by someone, I took the San Diego Padres. I had a home run with the Crime Dog Freddy McGriff. I actually thought it was the most lifelike game ever created back at the time.

Look at those penis dives in the video. Love how the Canuck doing the review (he’s into the game still it seems) attempts to sell us on the fact that “you can win a game with Taranta’s defense by isolating your opponent”. Dude, give me a break. It’s a shitty fuckin’ game and the designers didn’t know dick about attributes. They knew three things: speed guy, power guy, and slap guy. And good for them on that one.

If you ever had the chance to play this game, you will enjoy this video. Afterall, it is a game we loved as kids. And the commentary in this by that Canuck is correct, the old man does try to fit everything in during his anouncing of the game and he gets all backed up. That’s what made it so hideous. And Toronto Won! And look at that hideous Sega Genesis graphics pic of Dave Stieb! It’s terrible!

“TIME OUT! TIME OUT! TIME OUT!”