Laynce Dicks is back

In case you missed it, and let’s be honest you probably did; the Cincinnati Reds have decided to bring back Laynce Nix.

Here you have a guy who is incredibly mediocre in almost every area; and serves no purpose other then to take at-bats away from guys like Chris Heisey, Chris Dickerson, Drew Stubbs and even Jay Bruce in the outfield.

If you pair that with the fact that Dusty Baker will use any excuse to plug a low OBP guy like Nix into the middle of his order on any given night; well you’re all set for a full-blown clusterfuck once the 2010 season begins.

This is the type of move that once again quietly announces the Reds preparation for extreme mediocrity again in 2010. It is a bottom feeder’s delight all year round in Cincy you see.

And if you’re wondering how he got the nickname it’s really not in all that creative of a fashion. We have a friend who said that if Nix was a pornstar, that would be his pornstar name, ‘Laynce Dicks’. He’s got that muscular frame and really it’s fairly easy to picture him in nothing but a pair of black socks in an episode of ‘I’m hunting Momma 24’ starring none other then Laynce Dicks.