You could take Al Martin off the Pirates, but you couldn't take the Pirate off Al Martin

Today we start off with Al Martin. Once again, a guy who was not terrible. A player who we even enjoyed and wished that would have ended up making a stop in Cincinnati. But a guy who was guilty of some hideous acts.

Martin claimed to have played football at University of Southern California. In 2001, he compared a collision with Seattle teammate Carlos Guillén to the time he tried to tackle Michigan running back Leroy Hoard in 1986, when he was playing strong safety at Southern California. In actuality, USC and Michigan did not meet that year, and Martin was an outfielder in the Atlanta Braves’ system at the time. Furthermore, USC has no record that Martin ever attended the university.

Sounds like something a mischevious child would do, Al. The next act just qualifies as odd, not so much hideous. It’s pretty humorous. Makes you think about a time when baseball didn’t have real problems for people to complain about:

In a September 1996 game against the Chicago Cubs, Al Martin spit out a large wad of sunflower seeds immediately after hitting a home run, prompting complaints from several viewers that Martin intentionally vomited on the field.

Oh no! He intentionally vomited on the field! Lock up your women and children!

Lastly, Martin was guilty of bigamy. The guy had more then one wife. When he finally got caught red-handed, he admitted that he did not know a drive-thru chapel ceremony in Las Vegas was legally binding. That’s just classic. Spoken like a true male pig (my girlfriend would say).

His best years were with the most hideous organization in baseball, the Pittsburgh Pirates. In 1996 he hit .300 and scored 101 runs on a Pirates team that featured the likes of Jermaine Allensworth, Charlie Hayes, and Orlando Merced. He had a section in the outfield roped off for his fans called “Al’s Army”. He never blossomed into the next Ken Griffey Jr. like we thought he would. He finished as a journeyman. And screw the baseball Gods for letting us be wrong about Al Martin.

Al Martin lifetime statistics. [Baseball Reference]