First off, look at that pretty face. Smooth as silk, with fucking no eyelashes, other then the ones that he paints on. I haven’t seen a silky smooth face like that since my last trip to Lazarus. He also has the nicest, albeit metro-sexual clothing that I’ve ever seen on a professional athlete. He’s always dressed to the 9’s and appears to have perfect hygiene.
If you can sit here and tell me right now that you can’t picture D. Wright living in a pair of those gay-as-fuck TEVA sandals when he’s just relaxing around the house, you’re a liar. This guy just lives in those things I bet.
Basically, while thinking
D. Wright Mannequin Wright is a hell of a ballplayer, he just strikes me as being queerer than a football bat (which there is nothing wrong with). The Teva’s, the painted on eyelashes, those perfect teeth, that great wardrobe….it’s all just too much for me this morning.
From this day forward, you are Mannequin, David.