The Pirates have stolen the Cardinals NL Central Souls

As we are here tonight, the Pittsburgh Pirates are about to move to 3-0 to start the season with a sweep over the Houston Astros. Only a heroic comeback by the Houston Astros (whom I hate equally as much as the Dallas Cowboys, no…more) would spoil this two fold unlikely from happening.

Yes, it’s true. By the same token, the St. Louis Cardinals are trailing 10-0 here on ESPN2, and as I type this Chris Duncan just got the 2nd hit of the night for the Cardinals period. It’s all happened at that brand spankin’ new ballpark in St. Louis, “The New Busch”.

Oh yeah, and don’t look now, but Solomon Torres, the man no one wanted in the fantasy baseball draft, he’s going to go 3 for 3 in saves by night’s end. Our good friend Mr. Rick Sutcliffe just mentioned on ESPN that ‘The NL Central is wide open’. Well no shit. We’re just happy to see the Cards and Astros taking their lumps.

The hope for us would be the Pirates use up some of their 70 wins against other teams so they can lose more to the Cincinnati Reds (like this weekend). The Cardinals on the other hand; well they’re probably going to own the Reds ass and the rest of the baseball world when it counts. Thats what I feel anyways. Plus their manager falls asleep at the wheel; drunk.

As this post concludes, the Cardinals are 0-3. Pujols is hitting near .100 with no homeruns. There is a God.