A Typical Day in the Life of Pronk

By TheNaturalMevs on March 19, 2007

-Wake up and punch a hole in his bedroom wall
-Eats Joel Skinner’s children for breakfast
-Watches the Weather Channel
-Drives his Harley down the sidewalks of Cleveland to the stadium
-Punches Mark Shapiro in the dick for looking like a homo
-Takes exactly four pitches for batting practice, all four he hits into the mezzanine
-Drinks sixteen beers pregame
-Dominates the opposition and scares babies
-Postgame has his pitbull chase Casey Blake around the locker room
-Orders dinner via roomservice, but becomes disgruntled that “Infant brains” aren’t on the menu
-Drives his Harley through a pack of girl scouts and into a brick wall, then gets up and walks into a bar
-Throws game at only black women, naturally he bags a few in the mens bathroom
-Goes home and sleeps face down on a bed of Playboys from the 1970’s